When I started this blog, I was pretty sure I wasn't going to make it too personal. I really wanted it just about my jewelry business, and yet, my jewelry business is so much a part of me, that my life seems to seep in anyway. And that is ok. That is kinda how I am anyway, an open book. There are not many subjects about my life that are taboo for me.
The reason I say this, is because something happend the other day in our neck of the woods, that just has me rattled to the core. Now, whenever I hear about this kind of thing, I am shaken, deeply, by the darkness of it all. But when it hits so close to home, the feelings are just somehow stronger...and I have been walking in a fog of sadness, fear and hate for the last 24 hours.
Perhaps you have heard, and if not, you can read about it here. A 9 year old girl named Skylar has left us, because of such evil in the world.
My son is 9. He is also in third grade, and I will tell you, its been hard to begin to give him some freedom to run and play outside, or go to friends houses without me. Yes, I am that mom, who would much rather have kids come here to play, then allow my kids to go somewhere with people I don't know. And yet, 9 has seemed like a good age to give Aiden some freedom. But I guess despite all our efforts, these things can happen. Look at Jaycee Dugard...she was taken from the bus stop where her father was just feet away from her.
I cannot imagine- what this family is going through. If I, am having such strong emotions, such a deep sense of loss, such fears and doubts, I cannot imagine. My heart breaks for them, broken wide open.
So today I pray, its all I can do. I pray for comfort for Skylars grieving family. I pray that God will not let me hate, because its all I want to do. I pray that fear will not rule in my heart. I pray that justice will be done to the man who did this (and he is in custody right now). I pray that the Kauffman family's hearts will heal, and that they will have the love and support of all those around them. I pray they will be shielded from the hate and media around them. Mostly, I pray that deep in my heart you grow this seed of love, because perfect love drives out fear.....
Heaven knows we don't need more hate in this world. Yet this is the battle I am facing right now. Hating, and fear come so easily.
Sorry for such a dark post. Writing or talking through things, is part of my coping process. Its an outlet for these feelings inside.
Praying for peace today...................
Amen! Well said Staci. Praying... it is all we really can do.
ReplyDeleteThinking of you today - my friend. Praying for peace in all of our hearts.
I've been feeling much the same way. I don't want to be ruled by fear and hate, but I have to fight to feel otherwise. I was up until 2:30 this morning with a child who was afraid, even though the murderer was captured. I started thinking about all of the people he has harmed by what he did. It's unimaginable to think of what Skylar endured and and what her family is going through now, but he's also harmed the innocent children who are grasping to understand this, the kids who were afraid to go to the park yesterday, the kids who kept the light on in the bedroom last night and were afraid to sleep. And he's harmed the parents who don't know how safe it is to give our children any freedom or independence, and wonder where to draw the line.
ReplyDeleteI'm glad you wrote this and I'll keep praying.
P.S. Wasn't Elizabeth Smart abducted from her bedroom in the middle of the night?
Denise- you are right, I am thinking of Jaycee Dugard.
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